Remember if he truly loves you, You wont have to comprise/ give up/ change anything about yourself! instead of early enough in your relationship that your child would not be in the midst of your problems. Though we divorced after ten years and two children, we still live in the same small town so that our children can still benefit from these strong family values. I am born and brought up there, and living here in US, so I know both sides.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^........................................"As I have just recently got out of a painful relationship,""I am a single mom and have to think of my child"OP.. That being said, one major factor in my decision to divorce this kind, gentle man was the overbearing influence of his mother, who he still lives beside. You gave enough description about the situation, and I don’t know how much you know about people from India.
these two sentences of yours actually concern me more.. Are either of these your motives for wanting a marriage with someone so soon after you just got out of a "painful relationship"? you invilved your child too soon in your relationship? He has since remarried a nice Indian girl (from Kerala) who came to Canada ten years ago with her son. Although I'm a Christian, I don't even know the religious persuasions of either guy, but I can tell you that each of the young men that my daughters are involved with are making them very happy ladies, therefore I support their decisions whole heartedly, because my little girls' happiness is more important to me than the race, religion or culture of the man they're spending their time with. I could tell you more if we had few more things written here about him. ” is - understanding his thoughts, and his way of at looking at marriage.
So long as they don't let preconceived notions or fear about a different culture spook them out of a potentially great relationship, I'm all for it. She met a man from the Punjab, Maksudra area in India.You Say “I am incredibly perceptive and intuitive, but you'd never know it.”? Even ignoring your little racial ‘faux pas’ from the whole discussion, It’s clear some advice CAN be given based on the contents of the original post: There ya go…he’s catching you ‘on the rebound’ and you are going to marry someone with an expiring visa who needs a marriage to stay in the country…from a cultural background that will shun or devalue your relationship causing a possible permanent rift in his extended family? If he can get his families consent you’re laughing…If you let him solve his visa issues before you get married things will be clearer…cleaner… I hope it works out to yours and your kids best interest, and u find your happiness and love...just be very careful. Culture has something to do with it of course but first and foremost you must be able to trust that this man is not just using your vulnerable position as a single mom to secure himself citizenship.Not saying it can’t work…just saying you don’t seem to be thinking clearly. I personally wont trust this guy, cause of the visa, arrange marriage and mostly parents issue. You know him better then any of us, and your heart will tell you if u if his honest to you. India is way too large of a country to start generalizing about the many different languages, religions and cultures that are encompassed within it.Does he speak to you all the time, or does he tend to speak down to you at times? There are people very conservative and people who are very liberal just like anybody else here.Some won’t marry outside of their cast/religion/culture and some people don’t bother about it at all.Slightly off-topic: I used to live in Nor Cal and I have friends/former coworkers/acquaintances in pretty much every single one of the educational institutions and firms you have mentioned. OP-You asked if anyone has been in this situation before. Oddly enough they met on the net, she lived in Washington state. At any rate, they spoke for months via computer and phone, fell in love.